Hummus

Because someone just asked me for it, here is how I make hummus. It is very scientific:

• 1 can garbanzo beans - the small can, not the big one.
• 1 can small white beans (habichuelas blancas) - the same size can
• A lot of olive oil, like way more than you'd think. I'm guessing it ends up being about 1/2 a cup-ish, but I add a little at a time until it tastes good. If you put all the beans in the food processor and then pour olive oil on top it should come about half way up the beans, and then you'll probably need to add a little more later.
• Some lemon juice. Maybe like a tablespoon or two, until the tangy-ness is just right
• Salt, just enough.

Put them all in a food processor and process until it is creamy. Keep adding olive oil until it is delicious enough. The philosophy behind this is: "Really, you'd just eat olive oil on your pita and it would be delicious, but it makes you feel better if it's thick and it's got some beans in it." Add a little more lemon juice if it is not tangy enough. When you serve it, float some very expensive olive oil on top, just a little.

Still so proud!

This blog happened to record the Carpenter's speech, delivered upon his victory. I paste it here in it's entirety. It was a really good speech.

This morning I woke up a regular Brooklynite like all of you. And now I'm standing here with Marty Markowitz and 6 ounces of cheese in my belly. And... I just couldn't be happier.

The Title Belt!

The Most Glorious Day of My Life.

Thanks for the shout out secretary. What an odd arc of a day that takes you to local Brooklyn stardom like a cheese-eating contest. We got to the street fair, where the eat-off was going to take take place, nice and early. I had just polished off the Hungry Man breakfast special at Joe's on Court Street. I knew that I wanted a big breakfast to stretch out the stomach, but I needed to work the food through my system before I could attempt to eat the cheese, for which I had done virtually no preparation. the night before I was at a block party, and I took a slice of cheddar and tried to swallow it whole, just to see if it was possible. I thought about my technique, but I certainly had not sat down to a plate full of cheese to see how much I could eat.

By the time the contest was to begin, the streets had filled with spectators at least 6 rows thick, and I was eyeing the belt. They had created a WWF style belt with wheels of cheese on it, upon which the winner's name would be emblazoned. I had specifically asked to go in the second heat of eaters so I could watch the skills of the first round to get some ideas on how I might win the thing. It turned out I was the last person in the first heat, which was a surprise, which forced me to jump in and eat. As I got to the table I asked a bystander to hold my glasses during the contest. The time was called and the eating began.

The first thing I noticed was the warm, saltiness of the cheese, but with all the eating going on around me, I was panicked into biting off big chunks to get some early headway. My technique involved chomping up the cheese into small enough pieces in my mouth and then taking the water to wash the chunks down in big gulps. It was all pretty gross, because your mind is very much inside your mouth - every crumble of cheese you are thinking "Can I swallow that one without choking?" Then you just throw your head back and swallow. Someone halfway down the table asked for a new piece of cheese a few seconds before I had finished mine, so I shoveled the piece left in my hand into my mouth and tapped my plate for a second. In what seemed like a second later, the crowd started counting down the last 10 seconds at which point I started stuffing cheese into my mouth. Big bites to fill the mouth. I have to say, I felt pretty slow, and I think I even slowed a bit at the end, being pretty sure that I hadn't won it. Good learning for next year, don't lose hope.

The leftover pieces were weighed, and it turned out that I had won the first heat by a slight little bit. And in the second heat, not one person even made it into the second piece of cheese. Then Marty Markowitz announced the winner. Then yesterday became the best day in my life. Almost seriously. Or completely seriously.

You may wonder why carpenter is such an infrequent blogger now. Well it's because carpenter is actually working as a carpenter right now. There are no computers in the carpentry world. In fact he worked as a carpenter today. One day, you're king of Brooklyn, the next you're building roof-decks for Kelly Ripa.

Thanks for keeping this alive secretary. I owe you one.

-carpenter

Brooklyn's Cheese Eating Champ

I am so proud.

Warmest regards,
Secretary

P.S. Great cheese re-cap at Harriett's Tomato.

P.P.S On the front page of the Brooklyn Daily Eagle!!

Red Hook Tacos: Check!

. . . and papusas, and quesadillas, horchata, deep fried roll thing, tamales, plantain filled with cheese, and bbq-ed corn. Delicious! And ouch!

We don't really speak Spanish, but made our way through with one key phrase: con todo.
We were there on the very same day that Chuck Schumer was making a speech about how awesome it is there, and please not to let the city ruin it by opening it up to corporate vendors. In fact, there is a very good chance we are on tv standing behind him while he talks, sloppily eating up some delicious corn on a stick. (That's be us eating, and Schumer talking.)

On the way home, we wandered past the projects and into a street festival with some seriously amazing dance/poetry/music being performed. As soon as the performance was done, the DJ called from behind, and everyone ran (I mean RAN) to the other side of the field to have a dance-off. What a perfect Saturday.

Also, we can check arugula off the list: Planted!


Tamale!


Cheese-filled Plantain!


Horchata!!!

Summer Fun Times

These are the fun things that I want to do this summer:

• Bike ride to the Rockaways
• Biker ride to Coney Island
• The Mermaid Parade
• Governor's Island (via water taxi?)
• Red Hook Ball Field Tacos
• Moonshine BBQs
• Plant Arugula
• Get strong for the big 100 mile ride
• Use my gift certificate at The Good Fork
• The Red Hook Pool
• Frozen key lime pie on a stick
• Boozy brunch
• Strawbery Shortcake

What else, Carpenter?

Sourdough Bread Recipe

I've got the bread recipe for you, but Carpenter will have to tell you about how to make the starter. It is as good as any sourdough I've had in San Francisco, and I am crazy about good sourdough. Old experts will tell you that sourdough turns out better on an overcast day, but I haven't made enough to tell the difference.

It's pretty much the same as this one, from The NY Times. I'm pasting it here with my changes for sourdough.

Sourdough Bread

3 cups all-purpose or bread flour, more for dusting
1 1/2 Cups Water
2 to 4 tablespoons sourdough starter (4 tablespoons = about 1/4 cup)
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
Cornmeal or wheat bran as needed.


1. In a large bowl combine flour and salt. Add water and starter, and stir until blended; dough will be shaggy and sticky. Cover bowl with plastic wrap. Let dough rest at least 12 hours, preferably about 18, at warm room temperature, about 70 degrees. I usually leave it for 24 hours.

2. Dough is ready when its surface is dotted with bubbles. Lightly flour a work surface and place dough on it; sprinkle it with a little more flour and fold it over on itself once or twice. Cover loosely with plastic wrap and let rest about 15 minutes.

3. Using just enough flour to keep dough from sticking to work surface or to your fingers, gently and quickly shape dough into a ball. Generously coat a cotton towel (not terry cloth) with flour, wheat bran or cornmeal; put dough seam side down on towel and dust with more flour, bran or cornmeal. Cover with another cotton towel and let rise for about 2 hours. When it is ready, dough will be more than double in size and will not readily spring back when poked with a finger.

4. At least a half-hour before dough is ready, heat oven to 425 degrees. Put a 6- to 8-quart heavy covered pot (cast iron, enamel, Pyrex or ceramic) in oven as it heats. When dough is ready, carefully remove pot from oven. Slide your hand under towel and turn dough over into pot, seam side up; it may look like a mess, but that is O.K. Shake pan once or twice if dough is unevenly distributed; it will straighten out as it bakes. Cover with lid and bake 30 minutes, then remove lid and bake another 15 to 30 minutes, until loaf is beautifully browned. Cool on a rack.

Lasagna Noodles

Here's the thing they never tell you about lasagna noodles: You never, ever have to boil them. Ever.

I remember my mom making lasagna, and wrestling with a pot full of squirmy, slippery noodles that were just dying to stick together before she got them into the lasagna pan. She is a champion noodle wrestler, and she managed to get most of them in the pan. It involved a lot of olive oil and two pairs of tongs. She did it, but it looked so annoying that to this day, I've never tried to boil a lasagna noodle. If getting the noodles in the pan isn't difficult enough. . . as you may know, one of the key parts in making lasagna is spreading a layer of ricotta (or cottage cheese, if you are a certain southern friend of mine) on top of the layer of noodles. Have you ever tried to spread anything on a cooked noodle? So while my mom does make a delicious lasagna, she does not make it very often.

Anyway, the point is that you never, ever have to do this. And you also do not have to buy whatever kind of "no-boil" fake-o noodles they try to sell you. Let me break down the math for you: It takes 8 to 10 minutes to boil a lasagna noodle to fully cooked. It takes around 45 minutes to bake a lasagna. When the lasagna comes out of the oven the sauce is so boiling hot, that you have to let it sit for at least another 10 minutes before you can even try to eat it. We can assume that the sauce is boiling hot for at least 10 minutes during the baking time. Therefore, the noodles will be boiled to fully cooked during the course of baking time. Yes!

So basically, all you have have to do is make sure you use plenty of sauce, and that the sauce is extra saucy. Assemble the lasagna with uncooked noodles, use plenty of sauce, and bake as usual.

Don't let them lie to you any more. And never try to spread anything on a cooked noodle.